How to phrase negative feedback to senior coworker about unwise jokes?Coworker frequently eschews providing instruction - How can I get my coworker to give me feedback?How can I encourage my Team Lead to give me the negative feedback directly before escalating management?How to handle constant sexual jokes from coworker?Feedback to company about a bad interviewHow to engage my senior management at team dialogue sessions?How to handle a manager who consistently says I give unfair feedback?How to address a coworker about their emotional behavior at work?Should I go to my boss about a disrespectful coworker?Dealing with a coworker making snarky jokesCoworker is lying about insignificant things…?
What are these round pads on the bottom of a PCB?
What can cause an unfrozen indoor copper drain pipe to crack?
Row vectors and column vectors (Mathematica vs Matlab)
How likely are Coriolis-effect-based quirks to develop in starship crew members?
Is there any evidence to support the claim that the United States was "suckered into WW1" by Zionists, made by Benjamin Freedman in his 1961 speech
How to find the transfer orbit from a initial circular orbit to a final elliptical orbit
Why is it wrong to *implement* myself a known, published, widely believed to be secure crypto algorithm?
Has everyone forgotten about wildfire?
Company stopped paying my salary. What are my options?
What dice to use in a game that revolves around triangles?
Can you turn a recording upside-down?
Double underlining a result in a system of equations with calculation steps on the right side
Names of the Six Tastes
Employee is self-centered and affects the team negatively
What's an appropriate age to involve kids in life changing decisions?
Why valarray so slow on VS2015?
Why do unstable nuclei form?
How does weapons training transfer to empty hand?
Not taking the bishop with the knight, why?
Is it a Munchausen Number?
Which spells are in some way related to shadows or the Shadowfell?
How can I make parentheses stick to formula?
Is there a need for better software for writers?
resoldering copper waste pipe
How to phrase negative feedback to senior coworker about unwise jokes?
Coworker frequently eschews providing instruction - How can I get my coworker to give me feedback?How can I encourage my Team Lead to give me the negative feedback directly before escalating management?How to handle constant sexual jokes from coworker?Feedback to company about a bad interviewHow to engage my senior management at team dialogue sessions?How to handle a manager who consistently says I give unfair feedback?How to address a coworker about their emotional behavior at work?Should I go to my boss about a disrespectful coworker?Dealing with a coworker making snarky jokesCoworker is lying about insignificant things…?
.everyoneloves__top-leaderboard:empty,.everyoneloves__mid-leaderboard:empty,.everyoneloves__bot-mid-leaderboard:empty margin-bottom:0;
My company has a tool that they use for requesting & providing feedback from others in a respectful & productive way (for both positive & negative feedback). It has a list of standard questions, like "What am I best at?" and "What can I improve at?".
Using this tool is highly encouraged, and my impression is that senior management are pushed even more to use it.
One of the senior people in the company recently requested my feedback. This coworker is 3 levels higher than me and manages the relationship with our company's biggest client. Since I'm one of the people tasked to work on that client initiative, I've had a very nice amount of interaction with him & exposure to how he operates.
My feedback for him is mainly positive - He's excellent at his job & a good communicator usually. However, I'm aware of a big flaw (which I don't think he fully realizes). This feedback request is the only potential opportunity to make him aware of his issue, but feedback is not anonymous and I don't want to strain our great relationship.
The problem is that he tends to say jokes (usually an attempt at lighthearted teasing) which often get taken the wrong way by people. I've worked with him enough that these are rarely misunderstood by me, but I've seen him say things to people I work with, and some of them have confided in me that they thought he was putting them down or making them look bad in public.
For example, one junior employee (I'll call him Bob) has a neutral expression that looks like a slightly frowning face, unless you work with him alot, in which case you know its just neutral. (Whether Bob should work on that facial expression or not is separate from this question). Since Bob is junior, he doesn't always have anything to add to meetings (very normal & expected in the context of those meetings).
During one of those meetings with 9+ people of all levels, this senior person threw out a comment saying: "Hey Bob, why don't you speak up ever? You seem way too excited about what's going on!"
Based on my experience with this senior coworker, I believe he was simply trying to make a light comment to help Bob feel relaxed & willing to participate if he disagreed with anything. Although the comment itself isn't so bad, the delivery of the line was said in a way that made myself (and others in the meeting) fall uncomfortably quiet for a minute, with forced awkward smiles.
Bob told me afterwards that he felt majorly put on the spot, highly uncomfortable, and wondering if he was doing something wrong (which he wasn't). Having been in the meeting, I wasn't surprised to hear that he felt that way.
Should I mention this in the feedback note (even though it's not an issue for me?)
If yes, what's a respectful, kind, & clear way to phrase this (while making it clear that I personally don't misunderstand his comments usually)?
communication colleagues feedback
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
add a comment |
My company has a tool that they use for requesting & providing feedback from others in a respectful & productive way (for both positive & negative feedback). It has a list of standard questions, like "What am I best at?" and "What can I improve at?".
Using this tool is highly encouraged, and my impression is that senior management are pushed even more to use it.
One of the senior people in the company recently requested my feedback. This coworker is 3 levels higher than me and manages the relationship with our company's biggest client. Since I'm one of the people tasked to work on that client initiative, I've had a very nice amount of interaction with him & exposure to how he operates.
My feedback for him is mainly positive - He's excellent at his job & a good communicator usually. However, I'm aware of a big flaw (which I don't think he fully realizes). This feedback request is the only potential opportunity to make him aware of his issue, but feedback is not anonymous and I don't want to strain our great relationship.
The problem is that he tends to say jokes (usually an attempt at lighthearted teasing) which often get taken the wrong way by people. I've worked with him enough that these are rarely misunderstood by me, but I've seen him say things to people I work with, and some of them have confided in me that they thought he was putting them down or making them look bad in public.
For example, one junior employee (I'll call him Bob) has a neutral expression that looks like a slightly frowning face, unless you work with him alot, in which case you know its just neutral. (Whether Bob should work on that facial expression or not is separate from this question). Since Bob is junior, he doesn't always have anything to add to meetings (very normal & expected in the context of those meetings).
During one of those meetings with 9+ people of all levels, this senior person threw out a comment saying: "Hey Bob, why don't you speak up ever? You seem way too excited about what's going on!"
Based on my experience with this senior coworker, I believe he was simply trying to make a light comment to help Bob feel relaxed & willing to participate if he disagreed with anything. Although the comment itself isn't so bad, the delivery of the line was said in a way that made myself (and others in the meeting) fall uncomfortably quiet for a minute, with forced awkward smiles.
Bob told me afterwards that he felt majorly put on the spot, highly uncomfortable, and wondering if he was doing something wrong (which he wasn't). Having been in the meeting, I wasn't surprised to hear that he felt that way.
Should I mention this in the feedback note (even though it's not an issue for me?)
If yes, what's a respectful, kind, & clear way to phrase this (while making it clear that I personally don't misunderstand his comments usually)?
communication colleagues feedback
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
add a comment |
My company has a tool that they use for requesting & providing feedback from others in a respectful & productive way (for both positive & negative feedback). It has a list of standard questions, like "What am I best at?" and "What can I improve at?".
Using this tool is highly encouraged, and my impression is that senior management are pushed even more to use it.
One of the senior people in the company recently requested my feedback. This coworker is 3 levels higher than me and manages the relationship with our company's biggest client. Since I'm one of the people tasked to work on that client initiative, I've had a very nice amount of interaction with him & exposure to how he operates.
My feedback for him is mainly positive - He's excellent at his job & a good communicator usually. However, I'm aware of a big flaw (which I don't think he fully realizes). This feedback request is the only potential opportunity to make him aware of his issue, but feedback is not anonymous and I don't want to strain our great relationship.
The problem is that he tends to say jokes (usually an attempt at lighthearted teasing) which often get taken the wrong way by people. I've worked with him enough that these are rarely misunderstood by me, but I've seen him say things to people I work with, and some of them have confided in me that they thought he was putting them down or making them look bad in public.
For example, one junior employee (I'll call him Bob) has a neutral expression that looks like a slightly frowning face, unless you work with him alot, in which case you know its just neutral. (Whether Bob should work on that facial expression or not is separate from this question). Since Bob is junior, he doesn't always have anything to add to meetings (very normal & expected in the context of those meetings).
During one of those meetings with 9+ people of all levels, this senior person threw out a comment saying: "Hey Bob, why don't you speak up ever? You seem way too excited about what's going on!"
Based on my experience with this senior coworker, I believe he was simply trying to make a light comment to help Bob feel relaxed & willing to participate if he disagreed with anything. Although the comment itself isn't so bad, the delivery of the line was said in a way that made myself (and others in the meeting) fall uncomfortably quiet for a minute, with forced awkward smiles.
Bob told me afterwards that he felt majorly put on the spot, highly uncomfortable, and wondering if he was doing something wrong (which he wasn't). Having been in the meeting, I wasn't surprised to hear that he felt that way.
Should I mention this in the feedback note (even though it's not an issue for me?)
If yes, what's a respectful, kind, & clear way to phrase this (while making it clear that I personally don't misunderstand his comments usually)?
communication colleagues feedback
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
My company has a tool that they use for requesting & providing feedback from others in a respectful & productive way (for both positive & negative feedback). It has a list of standard questions, like "What am I best at?" and "What can I improve at?".
Using this tool is highly encouraged, and my impression is that senior management are pushed even more to use it.
One of the senior people in the company recently requested my feedback. This coworker is 3 levels higher than me and manages the relationship with our company's biggest client. Since I'm one of the people tasked to work on that client initiative, I've had a very nice amount of interaction with him & exposure to how he operates.
My feedback for him is mainly positive - He's excellent at his job & a good communicator usually. However, I'm aware of a big flaw (which I don't think he fully realizes). This feedback request is the only potential opportunity to make him aware of his issue, but feedback is not anonymous and I don't want to strain our great relationship.
The problem is that he tends to say jokes (usually an attempt at lighthearted teasing) which often get taken the wrong way by people. I've worked with him enough that these are rarely misunderstood by me, but I've seen him say things to people I work with, and some of them have confided in me that they thought he was putting them down or making them look bad in public.
For example, one junior employee (I'll call him Bob) has a neutral expression that looks like a slightly frowning face, unless you work with him alot, in which case you know its just neutral. (Whether Bob should work on that facial expression or not is separate from this question). Since Bob is junior, he doesn't always have anything to add to meetings (very normal & expected in the context of those meetings).
During one of those meetings with 9+ people of all levels, this senior person threw out a comment saying: "Hey Bob, why don't you speak up ever? You seem way too excited about what's going on!"
Based on my experience with this senior coworker, I believe he was simply trying to make a light comment to help Bob feel relaxed & willing to participate if he disagreed with anything. Although the comment itself isn't so bad, the delivery of the line was said in a way that made myself (and others in the meeting) fall uncomfortably quiet for a minute, with forced awkward smiles.
Bob told me afterwards that he felt majorly put on the spot, highly uncomfortable, and wondering if he was doing something wrong (which he wasn't). Having been in the meeting, I wasn't surprised to hear that he felt that way.
Should I mention this in the feedback note (even though it's not an issue for me?)
If yes, what's a respectful, kind, & clear way to phrase this (while making it clear that I personally don't misunderstand his comments usually)?
communication colleagues feedback
communication colleagues feedback
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
asked 12 mins ago
c36c36
1,1262412
1,1262412
add a comment |
add a comment |
0
active
oldest
votes
Your Answer
StackExchange.ready(function()
var channelOptions =
tags: "".split(" "),
id: "423"
;
initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);
StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function()
// Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled)
StackExchange.using("snippets", function()
createEditor();
);
else
createEditor();
);
function createEditor()
StackExchange.prepareEditor(
heartbeatType: 'answer',
autoActivateHeartbeat: false,
convertImagesToLinks: false,
noModals: true,
showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
reputationToPostImages: null,
bindNavPrevention: true,
postfix: "",
imageUploader:
brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
allowUrls: true
,
noCode: true, onDemand: true,
discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
);
);
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function ()
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
);
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function ()
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fworkplace.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f136252%2fhow-to-phrase-negative-feedback-to-senior-coworker-about-unwise-jokes%23new-answer', 'question_page');
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
0
active
oldest
votes
0
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
Thanks for contributing an answer to The Workplace Stack Exchange!
- Please be sure to answer the question. Provide details and share your research!
But avoid …
- Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers.
- Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience.
To learn more, see our tips on writing great answers.
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function ()
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
);
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function ()
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fworkplace.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f136252%2fhow-to-phrase-negative-feedback-to-senior-coworker-about-unwise-jokes%23new-answer', 'question_page');
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function ()
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
);
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function ()
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
);
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function ()
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
);
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
